. Informed . Opinions .

November 17, 2010


[Taken from a recent research on Indian users of Social Networking websites. Here are some common trends desi netizens follow, and what those trends say about them.]

Trend: Status message talking about some ‘celebrity’ engagement

Some recent desi status messages read:
1. “The Prince got engaged yayyyy”
2. “Another royal wedding soon”
3. “Kate Middleton and the Prince look so happy together.”

Ah, such a great news for the mankind, particularly for the desi-kind. After a hard day’s work and after hearing about the telecom scam again and again, the news of our master’s engagement came as a heavenly respite. Let’s sing in praise for the new queen-to-be. The problem is, the media will move on to another chick soon, just as they have moved on from the stripped-to-stardom Larissa Riquelme to the clean-shaven Kate Middleton. Unless, of course, Kate keeps giving the paparazzi regular glimpse of some royal undergarments. The chap that will marry her will get angry, though. She will have to be careful, or meet with the same fate as her late mom-in-law.
[Side-notes: The British parliament will have to approve the engagement! What else do they have to approve – which jockey Kate gets to sleep with on the side? I feel for the British royal family. They are like very well-fed animals in a grand zoo.
British Taxpayers will pay for the wedding. Can they stake a proportional claim on the bride?]
Personality: The proud hereditary slave personality

Trend: Display IQ Score on Facebook profile

Admit it. Every once in a while you search for people on Facebook with an IQ score greater than, say, 161. You don’t? Well, may be you are not one of those people! But some people think that you do, and they are there to help you out by displaying there IQ score (from some shady application) on there profile. Visit my Facebook profile to see an example.
Personality: The narcissistic loser personality

Trend: Very high Farmville (or any other damn-ville) score

Getting high score in any of the games from Zynga requires determination, passion and absolute dedication. You can not get a high score there unless you are always on the lookout for a stray pink calf (that will grow up in 3 days 2 hours 17 mins and 43 seconds and start giving strawberry milk), or have created multiple profiles to be your own neighbor and to give gifts to your seventeen selves, or focus on anything even remotely meaningful in the real world. Treat those ____-ville games as just games at your own risk. Here is some more related information.
Personality: The I-live-in-a-fool’s-paradise personality

Trend: Tweeting (or updating status on Facebook) frequently

What’s the meaning of using social networking sites if you don’t let the whole world know what you’re doing at this precise moment? Who else will that other than you? Wouldn’t the world be a dull place without such updates as:
tweet_king 12:02 pm: Just entered a #Japanese #restaurant
tweet_king 12:03 pm: planning to try chopsticks
tweet_king 12:15 pm: cudnt manage chopsticks
tweet_king 12:15 pm: some wasabi sauce on my shirt #fml
tweet_king 12:16 pm: wiped the sauce off but stain remains
tweet_king 12:22 pm: sipping diet coke now
Personality: The I-fee-like-a-celebrity personality, often perceived by other people as you-are-just-a-moron

Trend: Following random celebs on twitterCelebs are to be followed, otherwise they wouldn’t be celebs. And it’s the duty of all non-celebs to follow the celebs on twitter. It’s another thing that Rajesh Kapoor is the real person tweeting for Shahrukh Khan. See who I follow on Twitter.
Personality: The floating turd personality

Celebrity Trend: Endorsing (or advertising for) products for free

A tweet from Shreya Ghosal indicated how excited she was to get an iPad (yeah, just an iPad). Sonam Kapoor made seven tweets about how overwhelmed she was by her first D&G perfume!
Personality: I-am-a-celebrity-and-I-have-no-clue-what-I-am-doing personality

Trend: Joining groups for a humanitarian cause

It is important to join groups/communities on Facebook etc to save the planet earth. Already a lot has been accomplished by these groups (read here). New groups like Save the African Tigers or North Pole is for the Penguins or Stop Poaching of Himalayan Polar Bears are popping up every day. It’s nice to see that finally some major problems of the world are being solved through Facebook and Twitter. It would be foolish for anyone not to join these communities.
Personality: The sheep

Just read about an example of how to better use social networking and texting. Manchester City’s Mario Balotelli broke up with his Italian model girlfriend, Melissa Castagnoli, via text message. They had met on Facebook.



  1. yes… I am back to being the first commentator on your post

    i had to read it twice to understand the sarcasm……… at first i even had missed the part, “clean-shaven Kate Middleton”! i had to search for her pics and see it for myself!
    the tweets are fantastic……..
    but the thing that cracked me up is the list of names of the social cause groups…….you rock!

    Comment by Pranay — November 17, 2010 @ 1:20 PM

    • Thank you 🙂
      And, welcome back. Didn’t see you in the comments-section of my last two posts.

      Comment by Raja — November 17, 2010 @ 1:27 PM

  2. brilliant!!! i loved it!!!! (please dont write another blog on such comments! i mean it 120%) … i have been going through this feeling for quite sometime now….. the other day i told my husband how people post “i sneezedjust now” like details here … i laughed about the engagement thing… i thoroughly enjoyed it !!! beautiful!!! fresh and brilliant post!!! thanks for making me laugh …. looking forward to another intelligent post!!

    Comment by sushmita — November 17, 2010 @ 11:15 PM

    • Thank you 😀
      I sometimes feel some people will start tweeting like, “I placed my right foot on the ground now,” “now the left foot,” “right foot again” ………

      Comment by Raja — November 18, 2010 @ 9:32 AM

  3. Isnt FB also a space you can be this total assh*le narcissistic pr*ck and yet have loads of people commenting on your foolishness. I have blocked all FV and any such ville application. Bahhhhhhh!

    Btw, Happy Belated. You share yours with my man. Sting?

    Comment by PreeOccupied — November 22, 2010 @ 4:05 PM

    • 1. it’s the same everywhere – facebook or real life. some ppl act “total assh*le narcissistic pr*ck and yet have loads of people commenting on their foolishness” while others may not get noticed even for a great deed. that’s the way it is.
      2. he shares the ‘malai’ passion with me 😛

      Comment by Raja — November 23, 2010 @ 11:32 AM

  4. Nice post, I enjoyed it

    Comment by FeelFree — January 24, 2011 @ 3:16 PM

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