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April 23, 2004

S: The story that had never begun

Filed under: Sojourn — Tags: — Raja @ 8:29 PM

She had come in giving almost no notice. Her bday party was just another day for me. She had received some nice dresses, and was showing to all. I didn’t feel any particular interest, though. I knew she’d feel happy had I have shown interest. She used to call me with various names, depending on OUR mood. Sometimes (that’s when we are looking at the same direction) it would be “dear” or “honey”. Some other times (when we are looking at opposite directions) it would be “moron”, “bozo” etc. I had given her a special name – MyLittleDarling (MyLi’lD, in short. This was for using in e-mails) – among myriads of names I use for my friends.

The next day she called me and said, “Hey, you know, I’m wearing that pink dress today, and the ear-rings also” (She smiled).
I said, “Ok, I’ll come and see it before lunch”
“Oye bozo ……..instead of just before lunch… Why don’t you come & meet me now dear?”. Huh what a sudden swing in mood!! 🙂
“Know what, I don’t want to disturb you. You might not like my presence while at work. When I’ll go for lunch, I’ll see you if you’re there.”
“Who said I don’t like your presence? I would love to see you dear”
“you WOULD, but you never WILL” (god knows what that means. I just said something for the sake of saying something)
“Shut up ….don’t play with words…stupid …..love you honey”. She suddenly seemed so full of emotion. And that percolated to me, too. I felt like I’d die if I didn’t let the emotions out. Oops, and I said, “Love you dear. Love you too much.”

Wow!! Now, once set free they just reproduce like a bacteria culture. They grow exponentially and never seem to saturate. Just out of the heart, and they can fill the entire universe in no time. She tried to control it. After all, she had let it out first. I tried to help her in that, as if. But in vein. She asked “Do you really mean it dear?” Her voice had something. Her question had something. It seemed as if the earth had stopped spinning for a while. The entire universe was anxiously waiting for my answer. I mumbled, “Hang me if any word I said were sitting there idle – each one just carried love for you.”

Half in disbelief, and half in an attempt to ease the situation, she chuckled, “Oh, really?”
That was irritating, and I wanted to tell her that. “Please Honey.”
“Hmmmm ……..”
She sighed.
I said, “What? Seems that you’re repenting the loss of precious 3 minutes of work?”
“What? What did you say?”
“Whatever you just heard”
“Okay, things are clear now”
“What things?”
“Do you don’t know how much I love you”
“Huh, I could feel it had it been perceptible”
“You can never feel dear. I know that”
“No point in arguing ’bout the existence of a non-existent thing”
“Honey, Please don’t say like that. I love you sooooo much dear.”
“Do you really mean it?”
“YES. I MEAN IT.” She was almost crying.
“Hmmmm ………. I sort of know that. And that’s the wind beneath my wings” (See, when those song lyrics come in handy!)
“Love you dear …………. Love you ………… love you just tooooo much.” And she started crying.

That’s real quick, phew!! And I miss her 😦



  1. Raja, remove both these blogs, written in April 2004. I don’t like them 😦

    Comment by Anonymous — May 26, 2005 @ 12:36 AM

  2. Raja, I cannot post in ur shoutbox.[-(Write a blog for me. :-p

    Comment by Anonymous — August 26, 2005 @ 2:17 AM

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    Comment by zane894jade — August 26, 2005 @ 12:20 PM

  4. hmm…. read it all!!! what a journey it was….

    Comment by Sushmita — December 12, 2008 @ 5:31 AM

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